Forget about what you think you know about life, about friendship, and especially about you and me.

I keep forgetting that my standards are not your standards. I forget that human nature is so inherently conflicted that no one's actions can ever be completely consonant with their speech. I forget that sometimes, sensitivity fails us.

I learnt that you'll continue making excuses for the people you care about until you just can't continue being hurt. I learnt this sickening paradox, that you'll never really know but yet you'll seek truth and knowledge at the expense of a clean conscience and a good nights' sleep.

So like, months ago, a friend of mine told me that love isn't enough to sustain a relationship, that kind of statement that you know intuitively is true but still sends you into an endless chase of what love does and does not encompass. How about care and concern then--is that enough? Is it enough to make you want to be candid, and not just honest? Does it make you pro-active, instead of lulling you into the false consciousness that making society's loose codes your own philosophy is enough to make you a good person? Does it make you less selfish, because care and concern is actually achievable, whereas love is only for martyrs?

It's good to think about these things in the night and figure out where you stand in relation to people. Then you know which direction to take in the morning...

posted by beautiful at 11:50 am