My friend Jo once told me she got on a train, then realised she was going in the wrong direction. She got off at the next station, but because she did not want the passengers on the train to see her walking stupidly to the other side of the platform, she took the escalator down and then up again.

Well, I never understood that sort of embarrassment and how people could choose to see what they want to see until today. In my eagerness to get home I grossly misread the number of the bus and stood up to flag it. But as the bus drew closer, I realised it wasn't my bus... and rather than sit down and look like a complete fool... I got on anyway...

To make myself feel better about my stupidity and the fact that having to change buses would take like, 20 minutes more, I prayed there would be a massive, massive traffic jam on my usual route, thereby justifying the time I'd waste in getting home. But when I looked out for the electronic road sign that always says 'Slow Traffic Up to Fort Rd' when I'm on my way home for dinner, I was sadly disappointed.

Somehow, I decided to stay on the bus and go all the way to church. I got in just as the homily started. I marvelled at the fact that in His own funny way, God had led me to Him. After the past week of just reading and fretting, I think He knew that I needed to recharge. Not in the sense of going out and having fun (which I fully intend to do later), but in the sense of taking time out to remember and pray for the people around me, and more importantly, to dwell in the presence of the one who is ever steadfast and loving, always patiently waiting for me to come back to Him.

posted by beautiful at 4:14 am

Shit.

I ate nearly an entire box of Honey Stars. If that's not out of control, I don't know what is.

Other things that annoyed me today:
1. Hunting high and low for my brother's black backpack when I was supposed to be doing:
2. Practice MCQs for philosophy. How some freak could actually put philosophy and mathematics together and come up with a book that got published is beyond me... this person mentioned something about locating (0,0) on the cartesian plane of the physical world...
3. Collin Raye's Love, Me.
4. The Honey Stars episode.
5. American Idol 4: The 70s wasn't my time, but I'm pretty damn sure Earth, Wind and Fire did not sing September standing frigidly behind a mic stand the way someone did. And what's with the bloody cleavage on every single show!
6. Getting two long red scratches on my stomach, courtesy of that fat ball of fur in the room.

I need catharsis this weekend.

posted by beautiful at 3:27 am