When people are habitually late, don't they ever realise what they're actually doing? They're not just making someone wait 10 minutes, or 30 minutes or one hour. They're basically proving themselves to be disorganized, irresponsible and disrespectful towards other people's time. And I fucking hate it when people make me wait, cos they're making an ass of me as I'm sitting there wasting time while they run around doing stuff that they left to the last minute. And the absolute clincher comes when not only do they tell you they're not going to be on time, they don't have the decency to rush for your sake. It's basically about principles, it's about what your parents and teachers have taught you, it's about basic fucking courtesy. If I've told you to your face not to make me wait, then you jolly fucking well try.

posted by beautiful at 10:52 pm

I've been touched rather inexplicably by a forwarded questionnaire. By someone's answer to a simple question. Are you a good student? No, sir. I've come to the shocking realisation that I've lost it and the blame is entirely mine. Where's that brash confidence I once had? I am reminded of the days when Daffers and I would sit at the back of class during Maths lesson (having already 'run' in 15 minutes late), sometimes we hadn't done our work, lots of the time we'd bitch about the tutor, other times we'd just roll our eyes at the fact that Maths sucked, the tutor sucked, attendance sucked... And we came out of it just fine.

It's just weird, the way I have somewhat abused the intelligence God gave me. By not liking what I study, by not putting enough effort into what I do, by purposely yet unconsciously sabotaging my chances by thinking (very wrongly) that I'm already giving my best and that I'm delivering the goods? No wonder I freak out uncontrollably. And when it's myself I seek forgiveness from, it's very hard to be at peace.

posted by beautiful at 5:38 am