I wonder if I'll ever leave this place. Does being aware of one's escapist tendencies stop one from taking flight? If I knew I was running away from something I was too chicken to face up to, then would I stay? Can I exchange this lot of mine for something else?

So two/three and a half years from now, where do I go... I know I'm jumping the gun quite a bit here, but it's time to start thinking. I've never been ambitious - I'm high strung and self motivated but I don't have a list of top ten things to do before I'm thirty that sounds anything like Adam King's (get that house, get that car, get that girl, get that yacht.) How do I answer the question?
1. We'll see.
2. Que sera blah blah.
3. Leave it to God?
It's got to be the most open ended question - does it even have anything to do with my present? If not, then why do I bother?

No, don't tell me. If every moment is a second chance, then it never has anything to do with tomorrow does it? Hmmm. We must be insatiable.

posted by beautiful at 1:20 am

Sometimes when Kancheong is sleeping, I stroke him and he doesn't know. He continues to sleep in a balled up fashion, and his breath makes his little body puff up and deflate. Maisy shat on the ironing board today and made me laugh. That's the thing about animals, they never let you down.

posted by beautiful at 4:18 am