For a split second, I got completely freaked out. It started with the smell of coconut milk - the smell of Asian cooking. It reminded me of Debs' email saying how she missed the food here already. I looked at the clock. 5.40pm. She would be asleep. And it hit me how far away she is. She's not here, or around, or somewhere. It's striking how time is so different all over the world. Maybe at 5.40am over there, she's asleep, but someone is awake doing something. Tonight at 10pm will it be an early start on a Friday morning for her? Or would she have been up and about by 8?

And then my train of thought flashed to our little holiday. 9.30am in London, 4.30pm in Singapore. We spent one morning in our hotel room watching television. How far out of my grasp that little moment has slipped. What was everyone else doing when we were watching TV? 6.30pm in London and we're deciding what to eat for dinner. Everyone at home is asleep. I remember feeling lonely at the thought. Feeling so far away and cut off. Nothing beats that feeling, when everything stands still and you are aware of how time can separate you not only physically, but emotionally. And you realise how time can change the dynamics of almost anything.

posted by beautiful at 3:00 am

posted by beautiful at 11:52 pm