I LOVE LONDON! I miss so many things about it. I miss the cool weather. I miss the hotel room and its uneven floors and sunken mattresses and carpeted staircases and grumpy French receptionists and miserable breakfasts and useless bath mats and windows that can't open and the wonderful TV programmes and the old fashioned built in radio. I miss the awesome variety of sandwiches that M&S stocks. I miss the Underground. I miss racism. I miss the beautiful cars, oh DQ you would die for the cars!!! I miss the motorways and the traffic jams and the never ending bus rides to the countryside. I miss the 5am sunrise and 10pm sunset. I miss the little shoe shops. I miss the ironic fashion statements. I miss the ignorant American tourists. I miss the way people blade to work through Hyde Park. I miss the dead animals on the road. I miss British humour. I miss the easy access to banned material.

posted by beautiful at 3:03 am

How self assured do I feel in unfamiliar territory or social situations? Not very. Let's see, I've been immersed in two or more dinner party scenarios where the majority of the people present are either wild, giggly, rich brat types (also known as superficial socialites. very judgmental term but apt more often than not) or young and innocent types (known contemptuously as kiddies to the superficial socialities). You name it, I've partied with it. Or them. Not always enjoyable experiences, especially with the former, but the point is, I've survived.
I've also endured an insufferable New Year's company dinner with people who were far older than me. Not much common ground? You bet. I've lived through junior college orientation. That, is testament to my own resilience in the face of tremendous adversity. So... no reason why I should combust in university, right? Bring it on. *weak simle*

OH ALL RIGHT. Enough whining about my insecurities. The only thing to fear is fear itself, etc etc. Today I woke up to 2 excited messages from a friend who is now in the Gold Coast. I was just there in 2001 with her. She said it was very nostalgic to travel down the same roads and see the familiar landmarks - restaurants where we watered and dined, theme parks, hotels. I wonder if I'll ever go there again. Mere places and buildings can evoke so many memories. Mere names. It's amazing how spending a short week with someone on holiday can cement the relationship, building an intimacy that no one else can share. Sometimes, if memories have no value other than sentimental, it's better we don't remember anything - because it makes letting go and saying goodbye so unbearable. Why am I even rambling, it's not as if it's possible to forget things like that. Bah.

posted by beautiful at 2:37 am

This is the sleeve design for Suede's Saturday Night single.

This is the life of someone who will soon be going back to school. I have worries about adjusting to university life, about having to meet new people and well, I'm just afraid of how my life is going to change yet again.

This is so weird, you know?

posted by beautiful at 9:35 pm