I want to buy a scrapbook where I can display all my cuttings of Suede. I am so bloody amazed at how far my obsession reaches. The band is fucking marvellous.

posted by beautiful at 7:06 pm

It is sometimes hard to like people even though ultimately it is easier on yourself to do so. Not easy to go around hating everyone.. your heart just feels so heavy... I asked my father how he'd define success and he told me that success is doing what other people cannot do. I don't think he means you're successful if you can climb the ladder faster and go places where no other has been - I think he's telling me that if I overcome the personal challenges that would have weakened someone else, I would have made it. I fear that I cannot do that. If my behaviour at present is any indicator of how I'll be next time, I'm in trouble. Yes people do change, but it's hard to become a better person. I want to be a better person. God help me please?

posted by beautiful at 3:53 am