*MOAN*

posted by beautiful at 7:44 pm

I attended the most beautiful Mass ever since... last Christmas? Genesis 2 was out in full force and their music made me tear, oh, what 7 times? Oh, it was quite funny today in the sense that I was supposed to meet Aud in church but got the wrong seat so I ended up staring at her sitting opposite me in the church all throughout Mass. Aloysius was sitting at the end of my pew and I swear he glared at me as I came back from receiving Communion. *shrug* But well Mass was beautiful in a way it's never been before. I remember listening to them sing Kyrie Eleison..Christe Eleison and I was thinking of Virginia Woolf. Like...a funeral rite...
I'm proud of the way I asserted myself to someone dear today. Not in a bad way of course. It's like dealing with a whiny boyfriend [if you read this don't take it the wrong way!] and gosh it feels so good to say 'I'm not going to entertain your moans because I've already told you before your skirt is not too short!' and how about 'I'm not going to feel guilty. I'm not mean.' ;)
Oh Paul...I saw someone who looked a hell lot like you just now. Curly poufy hair and skinny body and long neck. I thought it was a girl at first though.

posted by beautiful at 5:20 am

Which Garbage Song Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are #1 Crush. You love to love and be loved in return. You're very romantic. Be careful not to turn love into an o b s e s s i o n.
It's not for real...


What sexy girl are you
brought to you by Quizilla
Is she the girl in The Craft? Hmmm.


What box do you get put in?
brought to you by Quizilla
*moan* I've never been so displaced in my life!

posted by beautiful at 9:59 pm

Ladies and gentlemen. I hate BGRs.
I have a dear friend who has recently hooked up with this guy whom me and my other friend are not so hot about. She's been spending a hell lotta time with him lately and I feel side-lined, which is dumb because I know I don't own her. I also know that if she weren't together with this particular shithead I wouldn't feel so possessive towards her. Then again I want to be happy for her, but I must be honest: I'm counting down to their break-up, which will justify why I dislike him so much and give me a good reason to be outrightly mean to him. I had a dream last night, and I dreamt that I had made an appointment to meet her at the bus stop near her house. She had told me to give her a call when I arrived. But when I got there and called her home, her maid told me she was out. The significance of this is that for the past two days in reality her maid has been telling me she's been out, and she's been out with that guy. I can't do anything about this, I just wish that if she were out she were out with a guy who had a much better reputation and was at least well-mannered enough to say hi to people around him.

To make all this BGR shit even more insufferable, I bumped into my brother's ex-girlfriend in Cold Storage today. I must clarify that she's a girl I am fond of, and adore even. She's generous, talented, funny and very beautiful. And my mother loves her like an ex-daughter-in-law. She and my brother have engaged in on-and-off affairs since 1999 but all this has stopped for good now because she's together with a stinking 30 something year old now, and rumour has it that she's very happy. Happier now than my brother ever made her, even though I suspect they still have feelings for each other. It hurt me to look at her and think that I'm sceptical about her new relationship with some random guy, while I should be happy for her because my brother treated her so badly. At last she's found someone who will give her the respect she deserves and here I am, praying every night that she will find her way back to my pigheaded brother. It's all wrong.

It's strange huh, that I can't let go of something that slipped out of my grasp so very long ago. In this case, it was something I never ever was directly involved in, and yet it changed my life so much.

She once told me a good horse never grazes on the same grass twice. It's a direct translation from an old Chinese saying.

posted by beautiful at 2:41 am

What Kind of Coffee Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


How Black Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

So depressed. It's the last day of October and that means there's a new AOTM. Well nevermind, I can always watch Suede videos on DVD. And then Christmas will be round the corner! Ooh yeah and there's so many things to do like learn to cook, read read read, wait for Suede's gig, go shopping, bum around and sleep in! And learn self defence, and be a waitress and not have to go to school for 7 frigging months! ALL RIGHT! *does victory/rain dance*
So depressed....I want Suede...
*moan*

posted by beautiful at 6:04 am

They're home! The little babies are back and are sitting outside in a container because I don't have a cage yet.
Anyway I'm really freaking out. Last night I had to drink camomile tea and burn lavender oil to help me sleep without my pulses throbbing in me like a drum machine. I'm still tense today. I dunno why I'm feeling like this!!
I'm feeling so unprepared and I have absolutely no faith in myself. I wonder how to get a distinction for GP. I mean, yeah. And how the hell am I gonna pass maths?! God help me.

posted by beautiful at 7:22 pm

I'm getting my Roborovskis tomorrow! 3 of them! Though I've only thought of 2 names cos I didn't expect to get another. Any ideas?
So exciting man!


What Type Of Loser Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

posted by beautiful at 10:40 pm

SHIT! I forgot to say Suede's at the top of Asia Hitlist this week!

posted by beautiful at 3:16 am

Oh yeah!
My Top 10 Favourite Things
1. Suede
2. Lying in bed after I wake up
3. The satisfaction of doing lots of work in a day
4. Vaughn in Alias
5. The feeling you get when you wash down a hearty Chinese meal with Chinese tea
6. Green chilli in noodles
7. Being with my friends
8. When my mother hugs me
9. Heavy rain
10. Sitting in my brother's car and we're singing along to Suede/when he comes home from work and I bug him *grin*
Ok I just cheated, I sort of had 11 favourite things. They're subject to change though, as we all are. If I could have a Number 12, I'd say:
Doing Top 10 things together with my blog partners and reading them all after we're done. See, that's how much I love you guys!
Anyway some of you are wondering why I was away so long. Tetanus, lah.
NO NO *heaven forbid* my brother kind of blew up the computer and everything didn't work so...that explains it...
Lalalalala...

posted by beautiful at 2:52 am